When Taylor had her first relapse, she needed a little space and wanted to manage it privately. She knew love and support were there for her, but did not want to create commotion with her difficult news. She wanted to live her life as normally as she could and the decision to be private was part of her strategy.
As long as Taylor could, she kept her new battles to herself. She had hospital visits, treatments, and even surgeries as quietly as possible and did her best to hang on to her life as a normal kid. We all honored that wish.
But as time went on, it became apparent that something was up with us. Sadly, we began to feel like a topic of gossip and the stories going around actually started to be worse than the reality. At that point, Taylor rethought her plan and began to go a little public.
Sometimes you or your child need to fly under the radar. Always take your child’s feelings into account, even if your needs are in conflict. Patients facing challenging circumstances naturally feel helpless and need to know they can control a few things in their lives. Let your child decide exactly how public or private she wants to be and let the family follow suit. As a parent and caretaker, I needed support from friends, but I felt Taylor’s wishes always came first. And despite what I thought I wanted, I also drew strength and a sense of control from her decision.